Updated: Oct 30, 2020
Several people around us blame others for their problems. Friends, parents, children, bosses, and partners are the main candidates. For instance, some wives blame their husbands for not being social or extrovert. Some parents blame their kids for being difficult to deal with when they go to someone else’s house. Some kids blame their parents for not being loyal to each other. In short, blaming others can be very tempting for the wrong things in your life,
Whether they are the habits you don’t prefer or your flawed thought patterns. Nevertheless, if you depend on blaming others for your present mental and emotional problems, you are doing injustice to yourself in many ways. Let’s discuss why blaming others can damage your capacity for being happy and the effects of blaming others on mental health!
1. Blame prevents you from seeing your own input to problems
As long as you blame others for your issues, you don’t face any challenge in your life. As a result, you don’t get rewarded or cannot test your behavior. Your expectations and thought patterns impact the things in your life that you want were not the same.
For example, the parents in the 2nd instance given above could be seeking ways of working with their children on enhancing their behavior, or looking into why it may be simple or familiar for them to restrict them from socializing. As long as they mark their children as the issue, although, they don’t require doing any intense scrutiny, which would possibly help them move out of this stuck space.
2. Blame keeps you in a negative state of mind
Concentrating on others’ wrong deed keeps you in a pessimistic, negative headspace. Rather than seeking solutions, you are creating issues. Rather than identifying the goodness of others, you are looking at their mistakes.
In the 1st instance given above, some women blame their husbands for their inadequacy of social lives, which makes them see them uncharitably and negatively. This could contribute to feelings of marital discord and depression. In case they openly blame their husbands for not being extroverts or social, they will possibly feel attacked and may attack their wives back, which will cause both short-term and long-term marital problems.
3. Blame doesn’t make you free from the past
Rather than seeking ways to work on your negative thought patterns, blame permits you to stay bound in the past. In the final instance given above, thinking about your parents’ effect on how your relationship works may be helpful. But blaming them actively and constantly may stop you from delving into what is causing your unsatisfied conjugal relationships.
In no way, this implies you need to reduce or ignore the ways that others influence you. You should discuss your past and present relationships with a mental health professional, or to analyze them by yourself. Nevertheless, you should move from blaming others to an understanding act, which can give you the emotional and mental peace that you require for becoming more flexible and liberating.